Leighodore

JORDAN:
leigh it's jordan
i SAID
LEIGH
IT'S
JORDAN
leigh don't make me come over there!

LEIGH:
tone it down
hi
i was presenting my presentation

JORDAN:
yeah i'll believe that when i see it
and since i'll never see it
i don't believe it!
you're on thin ice young lady
you know what happens to people on thin ice?
they fall in! it's cold in there! it's very unpleasant!

LEIGH:
jargonnn.

JORDAN:
it's spelled "jordan"

LEIGH:
funny

JORDAN:
glad you think so
but that doesn't mean you're off the hook!
and i mean that in every conceivable way

LEIGH:
off the hook for?

JORDAN:
your behavior
now, i'm a forgiving type of person
so i'm going to let you get out of this mess
all you have to do
is
kiss my ring
just...kiss it!
well, are you going to or not?

LEIGH:
well, i dont think i can now

JORDAN:
well, i don't think i can forgive you then!
and you know what happens when i don't forgive people, right leigh????!1

LEIGH:
im curious

JORDAN:
i pummel them sharply about the head and shoulders!
what do you say to that, leighodore?

LEIGH:
pummel?

JORDAN:
yes, it means "hit"
"repeatedly"
"in a manner that is SUPER PAINFUL"
"and SUPER UNPLEASANT"

LEIGH:
pft

JORDAN:
do i not inspire FEAR in your very SOUL?
LEIGHODORE!
do i not ROCK you to your very CORE
do i not bow to your chicka wow wow?!1

JORDAN:
well leigh, this has been thoroughly dissapointing
i'm not angry with you i'm just furious
good day, sir!
i SAID GOOD DAY!!1