tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86029610719886395372024-03-13T07:30:27.325-07:00Best Friend For LifelongJordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.comBlogger462125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-26611311265278861752012-10-01T18:59:00.001-07:002012-10-01T18:59:24.498-07:0010 unlikely culturally relevant Halloween costumes1. The other Mona Lisa<br />
2. Mars curiosity rover<br />
3. The Romney sons<br />
4. The recession<br />
5. Bad NFL replacement ref<br />
6. Dead D.C. baby panda<br />
7. Dead print journalism<br />
8. Instagram<br />
9. Call me maybe<br />
10. Snooki's babyJordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-79818684211845814672012-09-27T20:10:00.003-07:002012-09-27T20:10:32.462-07:00My favorite article of the dayhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/24/fall-sex-season_n_1910963.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular<br />
<br />
16 Reasons Why Fall Is The Season of Sex.<br />
<br />
Highlights:<br />
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<strong style="background-color: white; border: none; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">3. Hot apple cider</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px;"> is a highly underrated aphrodisiac.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span>
<strong style="background-color: white; border: none; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><strong style="border: none; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">7. You're no longer sweaty all the time.</strong></strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span>
<strong style="background-color: white; border: none; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">15. After you're done having sex, you can steal your partner's sweater.</strong><br />
<strong style="background-color: white; border: none; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><strong style="border: none; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><br /></strong></strong>
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, Century, Times, serif;"><span style="font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px;">I'm sorry I just can't get enough of this article it's too silly.</span></span>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-59013413200753042812012-09-27T19:56:00.002-07:002012-09-27T19:56:47.507-07:00The lady who took my blood today was Tabitha. She has a son and she told me that she and her son play Michael Jackson: The Experience on the Wii together. I asked her which MJ song is her favorite and she said all of them. Tabitha if you're reading this thank you for doing such a good job taking my blood and for having great taste.<br />
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<br />Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-73617695489878074792012-09-27T19:50:00.003-07:002012-09-27T19:50:24.770-07:00There are no Chase banks in D.C. I tried to go to one today but it wasn't there. But then I saw the White House for the first time. I wonder what Obama is doing right now. I wonder what Newt Gingrich is doing right now. What does Newt dream about?Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-27340781936955969492012-09-27T19:48:00.001-07:002012-09-27T19:48:34.660-07:00Brilliant observation<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">My friend writes: "Pandas in particular creep me out, because they hate reproducing, which makes me suspect that they know something about the future that we don't."</span><br />
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<br />Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-80340717030887962262012-09-27T19:45:00.001-07:002012-09-27T19:45:03.965-07:00OversharingIs it possible to get PMS from donating blood? I'm feeling very emotional right now. <div>
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I wonder who's going to get the blood I donated. I wonder if that person will acquire some of my <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-558271/Can-really-transplant-human-soul.html">soul</a> or my memories. </div>
<div>
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I just creeped myself out. </div>
Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-21596708186114687892012-09-27T19:35:00.001-07:002012-09-27T19:35:19.985-07:00I think a man is just a demented version of a woman. You know, like the orcs? "They were elves once..."<br />
<br />
Men were women once but we were transformed to become uglier and meaner. Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-81415413105756599972012-09-27T19:29:00.001-07:002012-09-27T19:29:21.051-07:00I'm going to start posting every lord of the rings joke i makeMe: I'm donating blood tomorrow I'm nervous.<br />
<br />
Mike: Don't worry they just take a pint.<br />
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Me: It comes in pints?! I'm getting one!Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-29571533773183976542012-08-16T14:42:00.003-07:002012-08-16T14:42:19.548-07:00"To my mind a wedding's a very poor play. There are only two parts in it -- the bride and bridegroom. The best man is only a walking gentleman. With the exception of a crying father and sniveling mother, the rest are supers who have to dress well and have to pay for their insignificant part in the shape of costly presents."<br />
<br />
-<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diary_of_a_Nobody">Diary of a Nobody</a>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-51511932262787566362012-08-12T19:25:00.001-07:002012-08-12T19:25:33.441-07:00<iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ldqjM7x6NhE" width="560"></iframe>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-34798139120117603462012-08-12T09:23:00.004-07:002012-08-12T09:23:35.982-07:00<span style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 15px;">And I mean that—everything is fiction. When you tell yourself the story of your life, the story of your day, you edit and rewrite and weave a narrative out of a collection of random experiences and events. Your conversations are fiction. Your friends and loved ones—they are characters you have created. And your arguments with them are like meetings with an editor—please, they beseech you, you beseech them, rewrite me. You have a perception of the way things are, and you impose it on your memory, and in this way you think, in the same way that I think, that you are living something that is describable. When of course, what we actually live, what we actually experience—with our senses and our nerves—is a vast, absurd, beautiful, ridiculous chaos.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 15px;"><br /><br /><a href="http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/books/2012/08/everything-is-fiction.html">Source</a></span>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-55286907727229114382012-07-09T06:00:00.002-07:002012-07-09T06:00:32.450-07:00<br />
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Logician: Here is an example of a syllogism. The cat has four paws. Isidore and Fricot both have four paws. Therefore Isidore and Fricot are cats.</div>
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Old Gentleman: My dog has got four paws.</div>
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Logician: Then it is a cat.</div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Part-Time Maintenance Cleaner/ Historian- Grant Writer at Non-Profit</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Description:</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">We are looking for a highly motivated candidate with a strong interest in janitorial work and the non-profit sphere. Must be able to write clean, snappy copy.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Candidates must have 3-5 years experience in cleaning and/or maintenance, the ability to lift and carry objects up to 50 pounds, master's degree or PhD, and good communication skills. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Responsibilities include:</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Removing snow </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Editing, proofreading, compiling, and writing grant proposal packages</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Operating specialized cleaning machines</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Comparing programmatic elements of proposals to budget</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Moving furniture and equipment</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Cleaning public areas</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Compiling history</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Languages needed</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">English (Required)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Mandarin Chinese (Suggested)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">How to Apply:</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Send resume and cover letter. <span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;">In the letter, list your qualifications and reason for seeking the position. Be brief!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<br /></div>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-91747523415729056812012-04-22T17:51:00.000-07:002012-04-22T17:53:07.606-07:00YES<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(26, 26, 26); font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; "><strong style="background-image: initial; background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; border-top-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-left-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-color: initial; font-size: 13px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; outline-width: 0px; outline-style: initial; outline-color: initial; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; border-style: initial; border-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; ">Q: Do you think that you have already achieved the American Dream of being your own boss? </strong></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(26, 26, 26); font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; "><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(26, 26, 26); font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; "><b>A</b>: Yes, I do...umm, but I don't know what the American Dream is. I never heard of it before. Are you going to buy a Fun Pass from me now?</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(26, 26, 26); font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; "><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(26, 26, 26); font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; ">[<a href="http://laist.com/2012/04/21/laist_interviews_nine_year_old_cain.php">Story</a>]</span></div>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-4437805333741894002012-04-18T18:12:00.000-07:002012-04-18T18:13:22.213-07:00<span ><span style="font-size: 100%;">"Some men, after they have crawled through a thousand </span>indignities<span style="font-size: 100%;"> to the supreme dignity, have been assailed by the gloomy thought that all their labours were but for the sake of an epitaph."</span></span>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-77395181442093026692012-04-11T10:03:00.001-07:002012-04-11T10:03:25.475-07:00I just wanna boogie<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/tzFWg4sizsI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-15831900375451183992012-04-09T19:32:00.002-07:002012-04-09T19:33:25.567-07:00<span style="font-weight: normal; ">This epistemological impasse precisely marks the postcolonial knowledge condition. It is an amnesia, but one that does not exactly mean forgetting; rather, it signifies</span><b> the collective condition of a group that does not know what has been forgotten.</b>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-5207379976676908182012-04-09T19:06:00.003-07:002012-04-09T19:08:11.332-07:00<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>In the midst of the discussion, a peasant....said: "Now I see that without man there is no world." <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>...The educator responded: "Let's say, for the sake of argument, that all the men on earth were to die, but that the earth itself remained, together with trees, birds, animals, rivers, seas, the stars ... wouldn't all this be a world?" </div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>"Oh no," the peasant replied emphatically. "There would be no one to say: 'This is a world.'"</div>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-73816416898935152432012-03-18T13:29:00.001-07:002012-03-18T13:30:51.958-07:00"Nothing is more embarrassing... than the irritable patriotism of the Americans" - Alexis de TocquevilleJordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-3025450850955816672012-03-05T21:30:00.002-08:002012-03-05T21:31:06.674-08:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:verdana, arial, helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:small;">"As we get older, life seems to fly by faster and faster. That's because we structure our experience of time around memories. We remember events in relation to other events. But as we get older, and our experiences become less unique, our memories can blend together. If yesterday's lunch is indistinguishable from the one you ate the day before, it'll end up being forgotten. That's why it's so hard to remember meals. In the same way, if you're not doing things that are unique and different and memorable, this year can come to resemble the last, and end up being just as forgettable as yesterday's lunch. That's why it's so important to pack your life with interesting experiences that make your life memorable, and provide a texture to the passage of time." -JF</span>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-12642131113628691782012-02-29T10:58:00.002-08:002012-02-29T10:59:07.702-08:00<blockquote>"Elementary childhood fears: the fear of physical destruction and the fear of social death." </blockquote>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-58164132787640482232012-02-29T10:38:00.003-08:002012-02-29T10:40:01.935-08:00<blockquote>"Alan Turing, the brilliant mathematical logician who played a pivotal role in breaking German codes during World War II, was a great fan of Disney's Snow White. He was said to have chanted from memory the couplet: 'Dip the apple in the brew / Let the Sleeping Death seep through.' Shortly after the British government 'rewarded' Turing for his brilliant work in cryptography by giving him hormone injections to 'cure' his homosexuality, he committed suicide by biting into a poisoned apple injected with cyanide."</blockquote>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-52065585348858716482012-02-29T06:06:00.000-08:002012-02-29T06:07:21.187-08:00<blockquote>"<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; color: rgb(34, 34, 34); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; ">We live in an extraordinarily debauched, interesting, savage world, where things really don't come out even. The purpose of true drama is to help remind us of that. Perhaps this does have an accidental, a cumulative social effect -- to remind us to be a little more humble or a little more grateful or a little more ruminative."</span></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; color: rgb(34, 34, 34); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; "></span>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-47996885386764360602012-02-28T08:38:00.001-08:002012-02-28T08:38:33.279-08:00Food for thoguhtI've got to write a poem,<br />And my head is full of mush,<br />And my thoughts are moving in it,<br />Like a turtle in the slush.<br />Oh, I cannot write a poem<br />When my thoughts are in the slush,<br />So have pity on a fellow<br />Whose head is filled with mush.Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8602961071988639537.post-3363139486076952832011-07-25T13:51:00.000-07:002011-07-25T13:53:30.931-07:00Breaking News<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-eRirOV4XP8E/Ti3XX_XU5CI/AAAAAAAABro/-Rjou4vNe9E/s1600/Screen%2Bshot%2B2011-07-25%2Bat%2B12.55.27%2BPM.png" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 224px; height: 304px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-eRirOV4XP8E/Ti3XX_XU5CI/AAAAAAAABro/-Rjou4vNe9E/s400/Screen%2Bshot%2B2011-07-25%2Bat%2B12.55.27%2BPM.png" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5633395516056593442" /></a>AOL News Watchdog Update! Today we get this super important breaking news: the Vice President's wife wears colors! And she wore a "sexy" dinner dress?<div><br /></div><div>Why, in the name of all things actually sexy do we need to know this? AOL News please, please, have mercy on us!</div>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09550127435010230036noreply@blogger.com0