Wednesday, July 21, 2010


"His mom kind of looks like an older version of the girl from coyote ugly." - bro on the subway
"I kind of see myself as fragments." - photo class peer, explaining himself and his portfolio

Spy work

To find out about this unusual pair, please take the quiz below.

1. Did these men talk about:

a) Sex
b) Gloria Steinem
c) workouts
d) Billy Graham
e) fashion
f) the gays
g) all of the above

2. Which man said the following: "I mean, I can pay for sex! She's got to offer more than that. I want to say to her, 'You are competing with 50 thousand prostitutes in this city, and that's a losing proposition.'"

a) dark man on the left
b) huge white man on the right

3) Which man said the following: "I want her to like me for me."

a) dark man on the left
b) huge white man on the right

The answers are:

1. g
2. a
3. b

So, to recap, these guys talked about sex, gloria steinem, workouts, Billy Graham, fashion, and the gays. The small dark man valued prostitutes more than his girlfriend, and the huge white man was the sensitive one.

Washington Square Park is a treasure, really.
"I'm talking about the hand of God! Not farts!" - photo teacher, with regard to a huge misunderstanding about Michaelangelo's "The Creation of Adam"

Monday, July 12, 2010

From the authors of Daddy: Why are you Laughing? comes the biggest book event of the last three millenniums! Ready it and enjoy! but bewareee

Spook Book
666 goulish recipes for the houliday
by Partners in Rhyme

1. Dead Man's pasta

3 newts
1 eyeball
4 cups of human hair
Fresh ground pepper

Stir until SCARY!
2. Cookies shaped like ghosts

Little m&m pieces for the eyes
White frosting
Milk (it's healthy!)

When the full moon rises, pre-heat the oven to 350 farenheit. When the clock strikes twelve and the planets align butter the cookie sheet. Cast three incantations then put twelve clumps of dough on the sheet, spaced one inch apart. Wait for the dough (and the dead) to rise.
3. Cookies shaped like witches hats

1 witch's hat
2 base the shape off of that
3 cookies
4 children to eat them (1 kid doesn't get one, whichever is fattest he could stand to lose some weight, survival of the fittest after all)

Whichever way you like it. Which witch would you choose? Choose the one which apeals to you. I'm from Wichita. Bake until golden brown. Or black like midnight! Heee hee ehe eheeeee
4. Goblin's Gauntlet (Martini)

1 vial of blood
2 vials of chicken broth
3 teaspoons of parnsip
7 elevens
8 bags of candy

Go the bar and ask the bartender to make you this, it's too complicated for MERE MORTALS! HE ehehehehe ehehee
5. Peanut Butter and Toe Jam Football (sandwitch)

1 eye of a newt
2 eye have a feeling (That tonight's going to be a SCARY night!)
3 eye of a tiger (thrill of a fight)
4 ghosts

Eat it under the covers when you're scared of the dark. You baby! hahah. What a baby scared of the dark.

6. Leprechaun Stew (evil)

3 pot of evil golds
2 rainy days
4 failing grades
9 bad memories
2 flat tires

Bake in a convection oven. Beat it up. Let it simmer. Feel bad about it. Feel regret. Cook until it all sinks in. Or it turns golden brown.

Other sweet and scary recipes include:

Devil's Cocktail Delight Dream
Huevos Ranscaros!
Witching Hour Pancakes
Aunt Jelata's Enchalatas
Dead Man Tar-tarred and feathered (ooooh)
Taco with human body parts and ground beef in it souflee
Black Cat Fish
40 Sacrificial Virgin Strawberry Daqueri
Pastina for ETERNITY
Macaroni and ghouls
Ghoulkie cripss
Chocolate chip ghoulkies
Ghoul cereal
Pepermint ghoulies
Falet Sei Young
Flaming Young Children!


"I couldn't sleep for days after I read this cook book. i kept thinking that it was going to get me in my sleep or that it would use me for my toes in the stue" - Loser

"This is such a great book. It scared my taste buds off! i especially loved the Dead Man Tar Tarred and feathered. A winner for the whole family! My kids are actually eating proteins!"- Concerned Mother

"Buy this if you want to live. " - Partners in Rhyme

"Don't buy this if you want to die" - Others

Back Cover:

What can't they do? From the makers of the best-selling Partners in Rhyme poetry band, comes this book that will scare you silly! You will love it. They've done it again! Actually it's their first time making a cook book, but you know the one. Or should they call it SPOOK BOOK! They did call it that. And here it is. If you want to read it your'e half way there alreayd! It's mostly picutres! All you have to do now is flip the book over open it and feast your eyes (and your taste buds) on these delightful gems, or shall we say scary gems. Recomended by zero uncool chefs and 30 hot girls (hot ghouls).

Before we read the book:

After we read the book:

Two hard-hitting photos

The holy grail.

Welcome to New Jersey.


Socks over sandals? No. Just no. Like seriously, just no. Someone call the fashion police!

Guys I'm thinking of going into fashion blogging what do you think?

Beautiful Jewish things

I recently visited a dear friend at her home. In the course of this visit I was able to catalog some of her family's precious relics. If you are a cultured person like me you will agree that they are fabulous.

This stunning "Home is where the Hanukkah is" glazed platter promotes traditional Jewish values of family and tradition while appealing to today's hottest pottery styles.

Retail value: priceless

This unique cookie jar, shaped like a dreidel, the four-sided spinning top played with during the Jewish holiday of Hanukkah features a classic design, time-tested for at least a millennium, and is sure to make a splash in any modern Jewish home.

Retail value: one million pieces of gelt

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Wonderful world of photo

"There's some kind of cumulating nostalgia about it."

"I think I'm starting to feel the difference between what I'm attracted to versus what I'm interested in."

Prof: "You're on the verge of a breakthrough, I can feel it."
Student: "Breakdown."

Sunday, July 4, 2010


Ashley does not approve.
Ashley approves.

Friday, July 2, 2010

I swear to god, seriously

"She's brilliantly maladjusted, if that makes sense."- fellow intern about another intern


"There's no crying in baseball, and there's no laughing in publishing."- colleague

Thursday, July 1, 2010

"It is pregnant with potential."- photo class critique